Sunday, December 27, 2015

ZOMG IT'S ALMOST 2016. A reflection.

It's just after 8pm. The kids are in bed. They're not asleep, not by a long shot, but they're in bed. Deep, cleansing breath.

I should really take up yoga.

So don't be horribly shocked, but for the sixth year in a row, it's coming up on the new year, and I decided to get back to blogging. And it feels cliche. But then you know what? Who cares. The thing is, I like the New Year.  I like reflection. I like reassessment. And I like making resolutions. So I'm here, and so I'm gonna, and you're just gonna need to deal with it. Happy friggin New Year and all.

And as far as reflection goes, wow. 2015 has been like wow. The last post on here is from July. Since July,
we traveled to Idaho.
we bought a minivan.
we started homeschooling with a new group, where I get to teach a small group of kids once a week.
we went through the whole soccer season.
we threw birthday parties for 3 of our kids.
we therapied.
we Halloweened.
we Thanksgivinged.
we Christmased.
we... I gained a bunch of weight.
and for the biggest surprise change of the year, we got a whole new human.

Our foster daughter has been with us full time for over 4 months now. I can't show you a picture until adoption is finalized, which, thanks to the legendary lightning speed of government, won't be for many many more months. But I did decide to start giving people a "feel" for our family, by turning our newest addition into our ninja-est addition. Now it's not creepy. Now it's totally cool.
Christmas morning around the tree. Everyone looks a little nuts and no one is really sitting still. Because Real Life, folks.
It's been a year of change. New experiences for us. New activities. A schedule packed so full of work and appointments and social workers and court dates and education and church and sports that sometimes I feel like I can't breathe. And also? It's really noisy. I have to learn how to relax around noisy. And the messy. And the crazy. Ooooh the crazy.

And it seems in the midst of this life change, I have, to use a term the kids are saying these days, "let myself go", or "gotten really super fat again". I don't know. It's all very technical.

But I don't feel bad about it. Cuz the way I figure it, I basically had a new baby. Just... a peculiarly tall new baby, with a suprising grasp on the English language and a passion for all things Frozen. BUT THE POINT IS THAT I HAD A BABY.  And I always get fat when I have a baby. That's to be expected. The baby wanted ice cream and hamburgers. And really, I only gained like, 15-20 pounds. So, if you think about it, best baby ever.

We've been adjusting. We've been learning how to live our new life, learning how to fit in our new person and our new responsibilities, and how to do life now. And I guess, I found that transitioning was just a little easier with some extra padding. I need it for protection. The world is a dangerous place.

But now we're over 4 months in, the holidays are winding down, and we're starting our new year off as a family of 6. Still learning. Still adjusting. Still changing. But it's time to take the training wheels of self-indulgence off. It's time for me to work a little harder, and to get back in shape.

We're having our last family Christmas celebration of the season tomorrow, and I have 8 more presents to wrap before bed tonight.  Also, for all my hard work with the present-wrapping and the joy-providing, I intend to reward myself. I will eat and drink and be oh so merry. I'll check in on January first with some starter picks, the official jumping off weight, the plans for change and I'm sure more than a few tears and WHY OH WHY DID I EVER LET IT GET THIS BAD!?! but I have a few more days of indulgence to go, so I'm not there yet. Because there's this new thing I learned this year: Sometimes you can even just get fat on purpose.

Bet you didn't see that one coming.

Merry Christmas, friends. Indulge, rest, love, and joy all over the place. Because by the end of this week, ladies and gents, it is GO time. But for right now, I'm gonna go Christmas a lil bit more.

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