Thursday, March 31, 2011


Okay, I don't get this whole body fat calculation thing.  It's starting to tick me off.  I just calculated up using my current measurements, and apparently, though I have a BMI of 23.76 (definitely within the healthy range of 19-25), I have a body fat percentage of like, 31.9%, which is a measly little .1% away from being OBESE.  There's that word again.  I cannot fo-reakin figure this one out.  According to this stupid calculator thing, my body fat percentage HAS NOT DECREASED in my last 20 pounds lost.  According to this thing, for me to get in the HEALTHY weight range, I have to weigh 125 or less, and the athletic weight range has me needing to weigh in between 114 and 120, which according to my BMI would bring me down to the underweight category.  Just awesome.

So I went and, through my boiling frustration, found a different body fat calculator.  This one said I've got 27.9% body fat by the Navy's calculator, and 31.33% according to the YMCA.  It also notes that if you carry more of your weight on your stomach, (as those of us who have born children tend to do) it may err high. So okay, it might not be THAT bad.  But still.  How much weight do I need to lose to make this stupid thing happy?!?  I want to get one of those electrical pulsy devices we used in aerobics class in college.  That thing said I had 16-17% body fat when I weighed in the mid 130s.  Maybe it was wrong, but it sure as heck improved my self esteem.

But just so everyone knows, I am NOT trying to weigh 114.  I don't personally feel that that would be a healthy goal for me.  These body fat guys are not taking into account how wicked muscular I am.  And I'm only half joking on this one, medical and weight-trainer type professionals have repeatedly informed me that I'm stone cold buff, beneath my sizable layer of insulation, of course.

My anniversary, the big numero 5, is exactly 8 weeks away. (Yep.  My brain just jumped tracks.  That's how I roll.)  I think it's reasonable to believe I could lose 10-16 additional pounds by then.  I wish I had an additional couple of weeks, because I'd love to be under 130 by our lil' trip.  Unfortunately I've never had the willpower to effectively starve myself to skinny, so I doubt that's achievable.  I've lost 44 pounds so far.  I'd be thrilled to drop another 20.  Of course for my "small frame" (nope, no one's buying that) I'd probably still be considered anorexic, but I may very well be officially done checking my body fat percentage.  Because it's a mean dirty liar.  I'm certain I was obese 40 pounds ago, I'm not freakin obese today.  Psh.  Body fat calculator.  You're obese.  Obese, and stupid.  See? Didn't feel so good did it?? Maybe you should watch your mouth next time. Stupid body fat calculator.


  1. My body fat calculator = Do my pants fit? Soooo much simpler. :-)

  2. When I worked at a fitness club, we used the calipers, and I think they were pretty accurate. (I think we might have used the Durnin/Womersley
    Caliper Method). Right after I quit they started using a machine that would measure the water and fat (I think sending some sort of pulse or something to measure), which was supposed to be even more accurate. All this to say, I don't know how measuring neck, waist and hips with a tape measure can be accurate (at least that was on the one I found when intrigued by your post). I think there are factors other than the distance around these 3 areas that should come in to play.

  3. So according to the normal, simple BMI calculator, Nathan (Morgan) is obese. Nuff said.

  4. Maybe it means obesely tall... is that a thing?

    @ Kelly- Good point. Let's stick with more practical measures of weight, such as the classic, "Does my butt look big in these jeans?" method, or the Muffin Top Measurement. They will never fail!

    @Rachel- Thanks, I think I'm inclined to agree. Again, it seems they're not taking into consideration my crazy buffness. Right? Or something? ;-)

  5. I also agree about the going by the clothes fit. I LOVE that way (when I've been working out!). In addition to measurements and the scale, I think it's pretty accurate. I don't need a body fat % to tell me if I'm losing plumpness or not, I can see it when I look in the mirror. :) And, I will probably feel better about myself not knowing the numbers.


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