On my way to losing a marathon!

Thursday, June 16, 2011

A-camping we will go!

So this camping thing, gotta say, it's not too bad.  For starters, we're not so much "camping" as we are "staying in a hotel room with 2 sinks, beds, housekeeping, hot showers, electricity, bathrooms, and, as you can see here, rare, but present, internet service".  I don't have to work, don't have to cook, don't have to make our beds, or vacuum, or do the dishes.  Mostly, I hang out with my kid.  Oh, and read a lot, while she takes naps and goes to bed by 9pm.  Camping is flipping incredible.

Just to make things exciting, I set a personal goal for the trip: 3 pounds lost.  That will move me from about 147.5 to about 144.5, and I REALLY want to see the underbelly of 145.  Really.  Plus, that means less than 5 pounds till Shane needs to start doing sit ups.  Did I mention that Shane and I made a bet?  He grows 2 ab muscles for every 10 pounds I lose from here on out.  The idea is, I hit 120, he has a six pack.  We would officially become the hottest couple you know.

Anyway, the reason my 3 pounds MAY actually work out, is that, as you may previously have heard, most camping is done in nature.  More specifically, in the mountains.  Oh, and my swanky hotel room?  Well, it's about a mile downhill from the place where our camp-tivities are happening.  And while Shane has had the car to cruise himself around, I've been hoofing it.  Hoofing it, while pushing my I-didn't-realize-she'd-gotten-so-heavy daughter in her monster-truck sized stroller.  One way, the trip is downhill, and I have to lean back and tense every muscle in my body to avoid letting the stroller careen down the side of a mountain.  And the other direction, well, that would be uphill.  I walk uphill bent at a 90 degree angle so that I can use my leg muscles to push the 1000 pound child/stroller contraption upandupandup.  Oh, and it's not all paved roads.  No no.  A good portion of this trip is over dirt, or sand, leaves, pine needles, pine cones,  large, half-buried rocks, tree branches, protruding tree roots, and the largest number of giant ants I've ever seen in my life.  I don't think they bite.  Sometimes they try (I wear flip flops, so I'd know), but it feels more like a very tiny person trying to kung-fu grip your toes, rather than that normal ant-bite stinging sensation.

By the time I get to the top of the hill, I've been huffing and puffing for 20 straight minutes, and every muscle in my body feels like it's on fire.  I do this multiple times a day.

Now, I should mention, there have been attempts to subvert my weight loss progress here.  Jeff Atherton, our churches youth group leader and my self-proclaimed "biggest fan"  (Hi Jeff!) would like it to be known that he served me up an EXTRA helping of fries for lunch on Tuesday.  But he should also know that I ate a grand total of ONE french fry.  And about half my burger.  My family ate the rest, and to be honest, I don't care if they get fat.  So HA!  The ones who should really be proud of subverting my progress are the nice ladies at the Snack Shop, who  provided me (for a nominal fee) with a very decadent, very delicious chocolate milk shake last night.  I can also gladly say though, that my tiny peanut of a daughter finished most of that too.  It seems the kid likes ice cream.  Who knew?

So that's where my weight loss is right now, the one good sign I had was realizing I could pull my belt to the next tightest hole yesterday.  So once again, Either my tummy's getting smaller, or my belt is stretching!

Oh, and something I may delve into more later:  Freakin teenagers.  I don't care if saying this makes me creepy, or whatever, but if you have any sort of body-issues, just, stay as far as you can from freakin teenagers and their stupid skinny, firm, tanned, gorgeous bodies.  With their stupid short shorts and teeny weeny bikinis, it's just insulting.  Models do not look as good as these freakin 16 year olds do.  And why?  Because models are generally not 16.  Nothing sags when you're 16.  Nothing even wiggles.  Live it up ladies, in a few short years, it'll change for you too.  At least, that's what I keep telling myself.

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